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| March
31, 2000 Study links Diabetes to Agent Orange Hi, remember me? I've been very, very lazy about posting lately, I know. It's this blasted new domain name, which has provided the opportunity for all sorts of trivial projects... resulting in a lack of time for finding things like an exhaustive list of bagpipes in movies. In any case, I'm still alive and blogging, and well, April Fool's Day is coming soon, isn't it? Hmmm... Headline of the Day: "Pair jailed for hiring circus clown 'hitman'". Apparently the couple were arrested when the entertainer, "a conman and professional circus clown known as Banjo, double-crossed them and alerted police." Thereby once again proving that you can never trust a clown to do your dirty work. Here's a comparison of the pre- and post-censor orgy scene in "Eyes Wide Shut" (which was digitally changed after Kubrick's death... grrrr). They sure got a lot of mileage off the cloaked figures, hmmm? (from Ghost in the Machine) While we're kind of on the subject, maybe you'd enjoy "A Brief History of Banned Music", including album covers. 'And there rose a collective sigh from the weblog community': The practice of "deep linking" has been okayed by a U.S. judge. I was surfing for obscure Simpson's images yesterday (for no particular reason), and discovered a whole slew of fansites for minor characters, including the intractable "Khlav Kalash Guy". More shameless promotion of family and friends: Big congrats to my 'little brother' Ant, who won the greenboathouse chapbook competition (and will shortly join the small ranks of published poets) and my father, who's wonderful edible, organic garden was profiled this week on "Mark Cullen Gardening" (on HGTV). You really should write that book, Dad. Harley-Davidson Barbie? Looks more like a "Desperately Seeking Susan" Barbie to me... "I was just cruising on the Web one day when I stumbled across ASK SATAN. I asked Satan what to do with last night's leftovers. The recipe his Evilness offered me in exchange for my soul has saved my family!" March 28, 2000 Tensions grow over Elian Is it just me, or are celebs too well-behaved at the Oscars now? There were no drunken displays of emotion, no horrifying fashion faux pas, and little political grandstanding. And I can't even begin to tell you how disappointed I was that Trey Parker didn't get to take the stage in his fetching outfit. In any case, cheers for the amiable Michael Clarke Duncan, Hilary Swank's dress, the show's producers, and Jude Law (just for standing around looking like Jude Law). Jeers for Russell "We are not amused" Crowe, Faye Dunaway's ruffled monstrosity (no photo), and E!'s painfully boring pre-show. From the Foopster comes "Prerequisites to Being a Modern Conservative Republican". The transcripts of a lecture given by John Ralston Saul (Canada's philosopher king) entitled, "How we will make Canada ours again" are now available online. Twenty things you never knew about "A Clockwork Orange". (from riothero) I don't know why it took me until now to look for BobRoss.com, but I'm happy to report it exists, complete with a photo of the Friends of Bob Ross quilt. In my humble experience, The Joy of Painting is perfect 5 a.m. viewing after an all-nighter... such happy little trees... Cast away that demonic paisley shirt, and be healed! (from Medley) ILUV VANITY PL8S. My favourite one is the Dodge Dart with the plate reading "OBJET". Another reason why I'm not a dog person: Share your tales of woe with other canine owners at the "Strange Foreign Objects in Dog Feces" website. (Don't worry.. there aren't any photos.) A blog-centric list of possible blogging words? Bloggerific! Forget those revisionist history books of yore, and learn about the true role of Mr. T in American history. March 26, 2000 Canada's Reform Party vote to strike new Alliance It's party day for moviephiles! Prepare to make small talk with Oscar trivia, read what the author of "Inside Oscar" has to say about this year's race, or check out the results of the Wall Street Journal's controversial Academy polling. If you're more the literary type, perhaps you'd enjoy reading this online collection of Oscar Wilde's short fiction. For no particular reason, here's Oscar the Grouch's resume (?!). And finally, no tour of "Oscar"-related websites is complete without a mention of Oscar Meyer's "Interactive History of the Wienermobile". March
23, 2000 These
are the sounds... of pasta. March
20, 2000 Feel the power of the Interactive Scroll Lock Key! Now,
I find out if I got a job (a decent one, no less) today, so if you'll
excuse me, I have to go be anxious and stare at the telephone a
lot. March 18, 2000 Taiwan voters defy China Well, let's get the hard news over with quickly today so we can move on to the fun stuff, hmm? First up is a report that around 230 members of a Ugandan Doomsday cult committed mass suicide by fire. It's the second largest mass suicide on record. Also in the news, Microsoft confirmed that WebTV has its first virus, or malicious code, or whatever you want to call it. Boredom encroaching My links list is rewritten In poor Haiku Enter a twelve digit number and this site will generate the appropriate bar-code. I have no idea why you would ever need to do this, but there it is nonetheless. Don't be caught off-guard-- prepare yourself now for a Killer Guppy attack! "To distribute gasoline, The Empire will open a chain of gas stations called 'Vote Vader and Get Cheap Gasoline or Die Horribly', where premium gasoline can be purchased for 5 cents per gallon... [non-supporters] always have the option of buying the gas at the 5 cents per gallon cost and then dying horribly." --candidate Darth Vader on gas prices. If Darth Vader isn't your idea of a leader, maybe you'd prefer joining the First Church of Shatnerology. Bad toupees are a right, not a privilege! I realize this is a joke, but the very idea of a clam jellybean is quite disturbing. Want an 'international' feel to your webpage? Run it through the English-to-Swedish-Chef translator! And as if that isn't pointless enough, now you can also generate a Useless Superhero profile for yourself. Oh yes, you will fall and tremble before my newfound powers of Deus Ex Machina and empathy! "I did not do it with a knife. I did not, could not, kill my wife. I did not do this awful crime. I could not, would not, anytime." Oh my. It's the OJ trial as told by Dr. Seuss. Visit the Unofficial Self-Referential Existential Website. March 17, 2000 Second driver lashes out at reporters after daycare crash "I'd like to thank my getaway driver..": Fifty-four Oscar statuettes were stolen from a California loading dock. Police currently believe that one Wendell Wittler had nothing to do with the heist whatsoever. Mother Jones has an interesting article on two San Fransisco County jails that try to rehabilitate prisoners using such things as acupuncture and women's studies courses. Two programmers are being sued by Mattel for distributing their hack for the "Cyber Patrol" Net blocker. One of the programmers, Matthew Skala, was part of the 'weird homeschooled kids' in my small town. (He now also writes occasional condescending letters to the University of Victoria newspaper about how women's and homosexuals' advocacy groups are silly.) I feel SO old. And not worthy of being written up in "Wired". Bleagh. Canada is soon to introduce "U-Scan" machines to grocery stores. During my grocery cashier days I always said my job could be done by a monkey... but I suppose machines could work, too. Now it's official: Steven Spielberg's next film will be Kubrick's unfinished "AI". Rumour has it that Jude Law will star. The Kubrick Multimedia Guide has some choice links, including one to the short story that inspired Kubrick. Warning- Reading these stupid product instructions may make you laugh. Many thanks to Brainlog for pointing out the Skeptic's Annotated Bible. I've actually been looking for a resource like this for a while... First Lines gives you, well, the first lines of over 300 novels and asks you to guess the title. Is there something you like/hate about "Pith"? Yes, that's right, it's feedback time- I've been thinking about changing the format/subject matter, but I'd like to hear from current readers first... Much appreciated! March 15, 2000  Hmm.
I'm feeling all uninspired. If you were looking for actual content
today, give up now. Call it Blog Block, or the Blogger Blahs, or whatever
you will, but I can't even force myself to find links-- I have no
discipline. Instead, here's my school photo from second grade. Why?
Because I'm your mother, that's why. (I've always wanted to say that.)March 14, 2000 Scientists produce five pig clones Bill Joy, co-founder of Sun Microsystems, is worried that new technologies (such as nanotechnology and genetic engineering) could soon be the death of mankind. A bit dire, perhaps, but he raises some interesting points nonetheless. "I had a dream. I have a dream. I have a dream that all men -- well, it's not actually a dream. It's more like a hallucination. And it's not really men. It's more like elves, the Keebler elves actually." Duke (of Doonesbury fame) officially announced his candidacy for president last night on Larry King Live. Read the transcript, or watch the man himself in action. (video link will likely only be available today) Bleagh. An article in today's Salon, titled "Sisterhood is Powerless", seems to imply that feminism is partially at fault for the increase in domestic violence (because some abusers feel "victimized by recent changes in traditional male and female roles"). Yeah, sure-- the abusers are to blame, but if it wasn't for all those uppity women and their equal rights crap, maybe some men wouldn't be tempted to take 'em down a peg or two. Grrrr... Milksucks.com wants you... to have a beer. This is all right by me, except it makes my Lucky Charms taste kinda funny. Canadians: April 7-10 is the Great Gas-Out! No, it isn't going to drive the oil companies into the red, but at least you can get some good karma for taking a stand against something. (Yes, being a socialist makes me quite the optimist: "Tell me again about the proletariat taking control of the means of production...") Michael Winterbottom wants to use a real corpse in the opening scenes of his latest movie. Early reports say that the corpse will be likely be playing a dead person. What the..? I had no idea that Bruce Campbell starred in the 1997 made-for-TV 'Love Bug' movie (I can only hope that he remembered to bring his chainsaw along). In more Bruce news, "Ashes2Ashes", the "Evil Dead"-based Dreamcast game created by the folks behind "Parasite Eve" (a past addiction for me) will be released this Halloween. Come get some. Somehow I suspected that Sally Tenpenny would enjoy Webloglog... JerkyFlea reviews the best and worst of celebrity hair March 13, 2000 Majority want Canadian PM to quit Thanks to a leaked memo by conservative lobbyists, there is now a fabulous online reference of the forty-nine groups who participated in the WTO skirmish, including their ideological stance, high-ranking members, and quick reviews of their websites (including the insightful comment, "[the] website contains links to many other organizations"). While I'm on the subject, Corporate Watch recently updated their excellent archive of WTO-related articles. The Star Tribune weblog linked to this disturbing little form that tells if you would have been drafted into the Vietnam War (based on your birthday). Quite sobering. I consistently get a few hits a week from AOL searches for 'vinegar drug test'. My curiosity piqued, I discovered that "there is a myth that drinking vinegar will mask drugs; it won't. However, vinegar lowers the pH of urine. Amphetamines are excreted up to 3 times as fast when urine is acidified." Read up on other information and tricks for "Fooling the Bladder Cops". Break free of your moist, glossy addiction-- join Lip Balm Anonymous! Have you seen this link? I can't remember where I found it (sorry, someone!), but The Shower Project is the story of one gay man's quest to shower with a hundred women. We all need goals, I suppose... Retropics wants to help you understand your inner self through the modern practice of... playing things backwards. The site includes the stunning results of applying the principles of Retropics to a random Pokeman episode: one of the characters can be heard clearly saying, "They're afraid of anguish! The kids know!" Convincing, hmm? A definite four nuts out of five on the Kook Scale. Big congrats to Nikolai of Fairvue Central for winning the 'Best Student Website: Pre-College' category of the SXSW web awards! Today's entry was brought to you by the letter M. March 11, 2000 Gene tests urged for unborn babies As a Word Police Officer, I fully endorse the Home for Abused Apostrophes and the Gallery of Misused Quotation Marks. Ones' grammar is "important". "It turns out that instead of a 30-something Web mate, [Trevor Tasker's] cyber love was a 65-year-old woman ... in jail. Police had found the body of her former roommate in a freezer at her home." eBaby: Your Personal Baby Trading Community "I'm a capricorn (12/25), and, yes, I am single. My interests include carpentry, public speaking, fishing, and catering. I was born in Bethlehem, but I grew up in Nazareth." Welcome to Jesus' Homepage... on AOL! Sure, I'm not at SXSW Interactive like many blogger folk, but thanks to this how-to guide I can at least have big Texas hair. March
9, 2000 Housekeeping:
Well, the aforementioned volunteer site design project is finally
finished.. if anyone is interested in seeing some community theatre
in Victoria, B.C. (Ha!), check out Langham
Court Theatre. Also, now that <hyperbole> billions
</hyperbole> of new weblogs appear each day, I'm having a
tough time keeping up with them all. If anyone has some new favourites
they think I'd enjoy reading, don't
be shy. March 7, 2000 Mozambique's new worries: starvation and disease "If you think his daddy had trouble with 'the vision thing,' wait till you meet this one." Hooray! Molly Ivins has a new book out- "Shrub: The Short but Happy Political Life of George W. Bush". The segment "Teen Sniper School" was pulled from "The Awful Truth" after the Columbine killings, but it's available now on Michael Moore's website. A quest for a decent corn fritter recipe lead me to this fine collection of southern recipes (I particularly enjoy the appetizing marquee mentioning "the Blood of Jesus"). I'm still not sure about the Tater Tot casserole, though... Deconstructing Lucky Charms and Monopoly tokens. XtremeSimz is the best source I've seen yet for tips and information on your favourite little virtual people. Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks? Shaft! Who is the man that would risk his neck for his brother man? Shaft! Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about? Shaft! Right on! March 6, 2000 Altavista: UK Internet access free of telephone charges  I'm
in a mood today... everything in the news just seems to make me angry.
You have been warned. (Yes, I have been watching CNN again)Bob Jones U. no longer forbids interracial dating, but "Jones did not back off of the school's anti-Catholic position, and he said his university would not keep a gay student in school, just as it would not keep an adulterer or thief." BJU: Now fifteen percent less offensive! (but still pretty irritating) (link from Medley, who should update more!!) Speaking of offensive, tomorrow is the day for Californians to vote against Proposition 22, which of course you all are doing, right? Proponents of the measure are using the same bullshit argument that most fundamentalists do: 'We, the traditionally powerful, must take these people's rights away before they get all uppity and start thinking they're one of us. It's for the good of everyone. Really.' Finally, something that doesn't make me mad: The British government wants modeling and advertising agencies to adopt a "a voluntary code of conduct by which they agree to employ and promote people of average weight for their height". Looking for some tasteless amusement? Although it hasn't been updated in a while, Bus Plunge documents cases of, well, buses plunging off cliffs, along with amusing puns and fun facts. WhatTheHeck.com has a huge list of old wacky eBay offers, including Melrose Place pool water, and Bob Eubanks. (from Pop Culture Junk Mail) What does your phone number spell? "One of the most startling revelations in the history of human-squirrel relations" -- Squirrel Hazing: the untold story. March 4, 2000 'Coolio' admits hacking, but denies attacks on major websites Just a couple of quick and frivolous links for today... our (that being Adrian and I) first 'volunteer freelance' site makes its debut on Tuesday, which is proving to be somewhat nerve-wracking. Actually, finding some sort of job that pays is fairly high on the priority list right now too. (Note to Deity: Please don't make me sell maple leaf salt and pepper shakers to angry tourists again all summer. Please.) I watched "Fight Club" again last night, and enjoyed it even more than the first time, which is unusual for me. The original novel's author, Chuck Palahnuik, liked the movie too. Stanlee.net started operation this week, and currently features the first episode of "The 7th Portal", in which some web geeks become superheros who must fight the powers of evil. Entertaining stuff, but not quite as much fun as playing Centipede on Shockwave's site. Kottke.org mentions playing "Guess the Dictator/Sit-Com Character" with himself in mind, which prompted me to do the same. Happily, the site thought that I was Willow from "Buffy", which is really not that far off the mark (Although I'm not sure Willow is a 'sit-com' character?). Oscar show organizers want the South Park guys to edit their nominated song "Blame Canada", while Trey and Matt say it's up to the producers to make sure any offensive words are bleeped. It's going to be fun to see who wins this battle. Get some pity for your website with The T'inator. (from Windowseat Annex) March 3, 2000 Alberta unveils health-care overhaul with private hospitals Let's get right to the politics, shall we? Something Old(er): Slate deconstructs Bob Jones U.'s defense of their policies. (thanks to Michael for the e-mail tip) Something New: Dubya thanks Canadian Prime Minister 'Jean Poutine' for his support! (Rick Mercer strikes again) Something Borrowed: Giuliani has virtually banned dancing in New York bars... this is very, very silly. (from catherine's pita) Something Blue: Ralph Nader for president! (Okay, this has nothing to do with the colour blue, but it needed saying anyway) Speaking of Nader, a couple of his organizations are currently asking ICANN for permission to establish ten new domain names, including .ecology, .union, and my favourite, .sucks. In college news, The Other Side points out that U. of California students can now major in "Interdisciplinary Gaming Studies", while Beaver College is thinking of changing their name due to rude jokes and Internet content filters. Things I wish they had fifteen years ago: Now doctors can shrink your tonsils away painlessly, in a matter of minutes. Having company for dinner, and don't know what to make? Why not shock and repulse your guests with some yummy "7-Up Cheese Filled Pancakes"? No, really. The No Angels Page wants you to join their crusade to make all personal websites angel free. I think they're on to something... Yes, I've been really bad about updating this week, which of course has nothing to do with the fact that I finally got The Sims on Tuesday night. Nothing at all. During my absence, Pith hit a new high on the Beebo rating (#42!), which means either you don't like it when I update, or there's a thriving niche market for nude Harvey Keitel pics. Balloon Art! Autopsy for Dummies! All Nude Teen Stick Figures! Send me e-mail, dammit! All internally generated content by Pith and Vinegar©2000. |
